### Chapter 21 Ava Nerves danced in my stomach like butterflies on caffeine as I prepared for my date with Ethan. It had been two weeks since I was released from the hospital, and I had finally returned to my normal routine, the doctor giving me a reassuring all-clear just a few days ago. In that short span, the world around me had transformed. Letty and I had bonded more deeply, and Ethan had become a comforting presence in my life. Just the other day, he’d boldly asked me out, and to my own surprise, I had eagerly accepted. Ethan had quickly become a salve for my frayed ego. He brought laughter to my lips and a sense of calm that felt foreign yet delightful. When I was with him, thoughts of Rowan faded into the background, and the ache in my heart seemed to diminish—at least for a while. “Hair up or down?” I questioned Letty, who was helping me get ready over a video call. I wasn’t exaggerating when I said this was my first real date. Growing up, boys never exactly flocked to me. And during my marriage, Rowan had never taken me out on the kind of romantic evenings others spoke of. Surprise dinners were non-existent; most of the time, I was left waiting for him to come home from a long day, often abandoning the thought of dinner altogether. “Definitely up! You have a stunning long neck, so flaunt it,” Letty said, pulling me from my spiral of thoughts. “Ethan will definitely be imagining kissing it and letting his tongue dance down it the entire time.” A rush of warmth crept across my cheeks at her vivid imagery. Wasn’t I married once? Yet here I was blushing at such a comment. “I’m sure you’re exaggerating,” I mumbled, attempting to mask my embarrassment. “Not even a little! You are a beautiful woman, Ava, and any man would be lucky to have you.” “Beautiful?” The word slipped out before I could rein in my thoughts. It was an instinctive reaction based on years of conditioning. I had never considered myself attractive, especially not compared to my sister, Emma. People droned on about her grace and elegance, all while I felt like a wildflower amid a field of posies. “Yes, you are! The only one who doesn’t see it is you. Seriously, a little confidence, and you’ll have men falling all over each other for your attention.” Smoothing my hair into a messy bun, I let a few loose tendrils fall around my face. I desperately wanted to believe her, but breaking down years of insecurities was no small feat. I sighed, pushing aside the painful memories. “If you say so,” I replied quietly. “Absolutely! Now turn around, I want to see your look!” she commanded. Not wanting to overdo it in case the evening didn’t go as planned, I settled on a simple yet classic little black dress. My wardrobe was sparse, a cruel remnant of my life with Rowan, who had never seen the value in dressing up for special occasions. With matching black heels and a touch of nude makeup, I took one last contemplative glance at myself in the mirror. “You look amazing, Ava! Ethan won’t be able to take his eyes off you!” Letty exclaimed, her jaw quite literally dropping. “Thank you, Letty,” I smiled, finding warmth in her encouragement. “I’ve got to run, but I hope you have a fantastic time! Let me know how it goes.” “I will. Thanks again!” We hung up just in time, as the doorbell rang a mere second later. Gazing into the mirror one last time, I took a deep breath, grabbed my purse, and headed downstairs. Opening the front door, I was met by the sight of Ethan, handsome and charming, holding a bouquet of vibrant flowers. “Ava, you are stunning,” he said, his eyes traveling over me as if seeing me for the first time. “Thank you,” I replied softly, my gaze dropping. I wasn't accustomed to receiving such compliments, especially from someone as attractive as Ethan. He tilted my chin up gently with his finger and presented the flowers’ colorful array. “These are for you.” I inhaled the sweet fragrance of the roses, a surge of gratitude swelling within me. Rowan had never bothered to buy me flowers. To him, I was merely the mother of his child, a costly inconvenience. “Let me just get these in some water, and we’ll be on our way,” I said, turning toward the kitchen. After placing the blooms in a vase, we stepped out into the cool evening air. My heart raced with a mixture of excitement and anxiety. What if I didn’t know what to say? What do people talk about on dates? Ethan broke the silence, his voice warm and inviting. “Is it weird that I’m scared out of my mind, even after going on dates more than I can count?” I let out a laugh, feeling more relaxed. The anxiety that had threatened to suffocate me began to dissipate. “Not at all! I was practically hyperventilating all day. It made focusing on my classes nearly impossible.” I could still recall how my students noticed; they took turns calling me out on my distracted behavior. “I messed up a report multiple times because my mind was somewhere else,” he chuckled, and I grinned back at him. It was a relief to realize I wasn’t alone in feeling jittery. As we chatted effortlessly about our days, I couldn't help but reflect on how beautifully easy it felt between us. This is how things should have always been with Rowan. But instead, my husband had opted for Emma, deciding I didn’t deserve a fighting chance. “We're here!” Ethan announced. I glanced at the restaurant where we had parked. The name felt vaguely familiar, and as I looked upon its elegant façade, curiosity piqued within me. “I heard the food here was outstanding, so I thought it’d be a nice place to try,” he said, shifting the car into park. As he stepped around to open my door and gently helped me out, he guided me inside, placing a reassuring hand at my lower back. “Reservation for Ethan Anderson,” he said to the hostess, who appeared to be in her twenties. She checked her list, and the next moment, she gestured for us to follow her. I caught her sneaking glances at him, and to be honest, I didn’t blame her. Ethan looked stunning. In a different world, I might have felt jealousy rising, but in this moment, I only felt grateful. She seated us and left our menus, a moment later, a waiter appeared with a bottle of wine and poured us each a glass. “So, how does a cop afford such a high-end restaurant?” I asked out of newfound curiosity, not intending to pry but genuinely intrigued. Ethan chuckled softly before responding, “You could say my parents are well-off.” “Parents?” I questioned, surprised. If my memory served me well, he mentioned his father wasn’t in the picture. “Yes,” he continued, “My mother was a drug addict. She overdosed just after I was born, and when the FBI took my father down, I ended up in the system. I thought my life was over, but I lucked out and was adopted by a wonderful couple.” His narrative captivated me, deepening my interest in him. “So you’re a trust-fund baby?” I joked, trying to lighten the mood, which earned me a laugh from him. “You could say that, but in all honesty, I think you’re also a trust-fund baby,” he quipped back. I laughed, but it felt forced. How could I explain how wrong he was without diving into the murky waters of my past? Years ago, my father had severed ties with me. After the fallout with Emma and Rowan, he cut me off completely, stripping me of my trust fund and will. To him, I had betrayed his "princess." “So, what’s the most exciting part of your job?” I asked, eager to change the subject. A smile sprung to his face as he eagerly shared stories of his work. Soon, our food arrived, and we dug in with enthusiasm. Yet as the restaurant filled with more patrons, I began to feel the weight of my nerves return. I focused on Ethan, trying to shake off the uncomfortable sensation curling in my stomach, but nothing worked. “Are you okay, Ava? You seem really anxious,” he asked gently, his voice laced with concern. “Nervous?” I croaked, feeling caught off guard. “Yes. You’re fidgeting, and your eyes keep wandering around. Are you enjoying yourself?” he pressed. Panic washed over me. Should I confess the truth, or would it jeopardize the connection we were starting to build? The last thing I wanted was to appear ungrateful. “You can tell me. I promise I won’t be mad,” his gaze bore into mine, peeling away my defenses as if he could sense the internal struggle raging within me. “I do enjoy being with you—I really do,” I admitted, “But, it’s just... the scene. I’m not used to all this.” Everything around us buzzed with laughter and chatter, a vibrant atmosphere that felt so distant from my reality. “I’m sorry. I should have asked. I just assumed this is the kind of place you’d like,” he apologized, sensing my discomfort. “It’s a lovely setting, but honestly, I would feel more at home at a greasy diner than here.” He studied me for a moment before tossing his napkin aside. I braced myself for disappointment or anger, but to my surprise, he reached for my hands. “Well, if that’s what the lady desires, that’s exactly what she’ll get,” he declared, sincerity glinting in his eyes. Searching his expression, I found nothing but genuine intent. I placed my hands in his, feeling the warmth of his fingers envelop mine. “What about the leftover food?” I inquired hesitantly. “Forget about it,” he said as he led me toward the door. Once outside, I hesitated, pulling him to a stop. “I’m really sorry for ruining dinner. You don’t need to go through all this trouble just for me. You can drop me home if you want.” He stepped closer, brushing a piece of hair behind my ear before softly kissing my forehead. “Don’t fret about it,” he smiled. “Since we already ate, how about some ice cream? I know a great place.” A bright smile broke across my face at the thought of ice cream. Maybe this evening wasn't as catastrophic as I worried. Nodding eagerly, he took my hand, but just as we started walking, a chilling sensation crept up my spine, as if someone were watching. I turned to find a pair of familiar grey eyes. There he was—Rowan—standing with Emma near the restaurant we had just exited. A dark storm brewed within him as he glared daggers at Ethan and me. I quickly averted my gaze, shaking off the unsettling feelings his presence ignited. This night was about me and Ethan, and I allowed myself a moment of clarity. I was doing nothing wrong; Rowan had no right to be angry when he, too, was clearly on a date with Emma. Ethan’s laughter pulled me from my racing thoughts. He kept me anchored in the moment, allowing me to forget about Rowan, even if just for now, while that murky tension still lingered beneath the surface.